There is nothing-no circumstance, no trouble, no-testing that can ever touch me until, first of all it has gone past God and past Christ right through to me. If it has come that far, it has come with a GREAT PURPOSE, which I may not understand at the moment. As I refuse to become panicky, as I lift my eyes up to Him and accept it as coming from the throne of God for some great purpose of blessing to my own heart, no sorrow will ever disturb me, no trial will ever disarm me, no circumstance will ever cause me to fret-for I shall rest in the joy of what my Lord is- that is the rest of VICTORY!!!!

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Love is a decision not a feeling.......

I can't even understand the magnitude of God's love. The closest thing to this love that I can compare is my love for my daughter and husband. My husband Scott and I have been married for 7 years tomorrow and if I had to sum it up I would say its been the most beautiful mess I have ever been in. I could pretend its been nothing but good for 7 years but the truth is its been hard. Partially because life has been tough but also because we are both messy, broken, impefect, insecure humans and when you put us together we don't complete each other but just double the mess haha. The beauty however comes from the fact that in inspite the mess we have held tight to each other and God and have crawled our way through many battles and although we have been wounded and scarred at different times we are still standing together hand in hand in one piece. Those who are married or have been married understand what I'm talking about extactly when I say this and those who aren't yet married take this as an encouragement for whats ahead.

I was always a very independent I can handle life on my own kind of girl. Even in my late teen years I wanted to have children someday but I didnt ever want to get married. Somewhere along the way though unexpectedly cupid seemed to get ahold me with his arrow and there stood in front of me a crazy, not my type, handsome boy who swept me off my feet and even tough me couldnt say no. Actually when Scott proposed my answer wasn't yes but "sure" lol we always do everything different from the norm. Although at one point in time I thought he could do no wrong reality eventually set in for both of us and we realized that we both had faults and imperfections. There are moments where I could climb the walls he drives me so bonkers and I know he puts up with alot from me also but the truth is love is a decision and not just a feeling. There are moments where I dont feel head over heels in love with my husband and I know he feels the same way and there are moments where I really dont like him much and I know he feels the same way about me but we have chosen to make a decision to always love each other even when we dont like each other in that moment and thats what carries us.

1 Corinthians 13:7 (The message) Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head, Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first, Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,Doesn't revel when others grovel,Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trust God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back,But keeps going to the end. I love this translation of 1Corinthians 13:7 because it is very to the point, in your face, real, no sugar coating but pure truth. The hardest part for me in the entire verse is "love takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, puts up with anything." Man thats tough, there are moments where I dont want to put up with things I instead want to kick, scream, run and throw in the towel but God reminds me to " trust Him always, look for the best, never look back but keep going to the end." The last six years of marriage have been tough and so lets be real the next 65+ will probably be also but I choose today to infact trust God with my marriage and my brokeness that He may use what impferfections and mess we both have but surround it with love and hope knowing together we can't accomplish everything but we wont ever be alone trying.

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