Life is chaotic and unpredictable. Just when I feel like I have it figured out a detour always seems to pop up. In the midst of the pressures of everyday life we all have moments of becoming unglued. Lately my emotions have been on autopilot and it seems like every little thing that could go wrong has. Unfortunately in the midst of the craziness my husband and daughter often get the brunt of my frustrations. God has been working on me lately and revealing those not so desirable characteristics. I am learning that yes there are frustrating things in life and it often feels like bad things always happen to us but that is merely a lie from Satan. If Satan can get you to focus on the frustrations then he can inch his way into your mind and feed off the negativity and get you to loose sight of God's blessings.
After the house was quiet and everyone else was tucked into bed last night the Lord spoke to me about my emotions and attitude lately especially with my husband. It was a very real and honest moment and so I decided to write him a note. In the note I apologized for being such a jerk lately and shared my heart, closing the half page note with cow tails as a peace offering :) As I rolled over in bed this morning I realized I had overslept and quickly jumped up in a mad dash to get my daughter ready for school completely forgetting about the note. After Macie was dressed, her face washed, pearly whites brushed, breakfast consumed and lunch planned we were on our way out the door with book bag in hand and p.j. pants and wild hair in tow for me. Before we reached the door though I noticed the jagged piece of notebook paper with my sloppy writing and heartfelt attempt at admitting my grumpiness laying on the counter. Underneath my note to my husband there was a reply. One simple but comforting line reading
"I love you NO MATTER WHAT."
My husband could have replied in many ways, he could have snapped back how much of a bear I had been to live with lately. He could have pointed out my faults and imperfections but instead he portrayed a messaged that expressed his love to me even still in the midst of my undesirable attitude. At the time I deserved for him to lash back but what I needed was grace what I needed to hear most was that I was still loved in spite of my imperfections, in spite of what I had done or what I will do in the future I am loved NO MATTER WHAT.
This made me think of an even greater love and adoration God has for us His children. Regardless of what we have done, what mistakes we have made, what bad decisions we will make in the future and our bad attitudes and moments of pure weakness He still loves us NO MATTER WHAT. We can never out sin the grace that His blood has covered us with, as far as the East to the West so has His love reached out and embraced us. Psalm 103:11-12 "For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us."
God is pleased with our service to Him but it doesn't make Him love us any more and our faults any less. God's love comes with no conditions and no strings attached as a gift. John 1:16 (AMP) "For out of His fullness (abundance) we have all received [all had a share and we were all supplied with] one grace after another and spiritual blessing upon spiritual blessing and even favor upon favor and gift [heaped] upon gift." It still blows my mind and I know I will never fully grasp how much we are loved by the Father just for being us. God loves us more than we could ever want to be wanted. The God of the universe creator of all things loves me, little messy, imperfect, undeserving me, how awesome is that!!!!
"You, with all your faults and imperfections; you, with your defects and failures; you, with your hang-ups and emotional scars; you, with your weaknesses and your defeats; you, with all of your blunders, brokenness, and floundering: you are God's beloved, God's favored, the disciple whose name God calls, the one Jesus prefers to hang with, eat with, play with, talk with, cry with, and laugh with. You are the one whom the holy God of heaven and earth longs to spend time with. You are all of this and more. You always have been. And you always will be" Mike Yaconelli.
I am so thankful today that I can trust in a God that doesn't base love on my actions or a set of rules. I am thankful today that in spite of my brokenness I am still loved. Romans 8: 38-39 "For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." I am thankful today for a God that isn't based on religion but a relationship. A realtionship thats personal and intimate and real. Thank You Jesus that "You see the depths of my heart and YOU LOVE ME THE SAME.....NO MATTER WHAT!
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