Victory.....

When there are so many uncertainties in life, when Satan tries to cloud our minds and hearts with confusion our hope can rest on the promise of Jesus. Our minds and our thoughts can become such a powerful defense in our battle against the enemy and one thing I have learned is that when Satan likes to cause doubt, God replaces with absolute. Life is full of maybes, mights, probables, possibles and sometimes but with Jesus we can hold to His promises and be confident that there is NO maybe, there is NO possibly, there is NO probably, and there is no might but we can claim with 100% certainty that God will be victorious and that we can stand on that promise and seek, believe and receive it with our whole hearts!!!!

As we read throughout the Bible we never read that God possibly delivered someone from the hurts of imprisonment, we don't read that God probably will set captives hearts free, we don't read that its possible for Him to heal the sick, we read that I WILL, with boldness, passion, and positivity. "Those who hope in the Lord He WILL renew theirs strength. They will mount up on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not faint."A beautiful reminder that although you may be weak, although you may be tired I WILL renew your strength. The verse doesnt say maybe, might, or possibly, it says HE WILL, with absolute confidence and expectation!!! We are considering it already done and for that God will have victory and praise!!! 

As life causes doubt, as Satan tries to throw in uncertainty God is our defense and can fight the battle for us with absolute  certainty because He knows He will be victorious. When Satan has to throw in the mights or possibles because he doesn't know if the battle can be won, God is already claiming it! There may still be a fight but a winner is already chosen before the match takes place. God has already promised to give us the win and through Him we can rest assured and bask in a party of celebration!

In Christ Alone.....

In circumstances where nothing makes sense I sometimes wonder why? When tragedies strike, when health emergencies arise, when innocent children are hurt, when life knocks us off our feet with the harshness of this world I just stand speechless. Not because I don't trust in God but I just don't understand why?

I can rest assured that although there may not be a reason behind the heartache I know there is a God who will meet us right in the midst of our pain and wipe every single tear from our eyes. Its in those moments of uncertainty where we become desperate for Jesus to wrap His arms tightly around us saying "I am with you." I don't think there is this insatiable need to be a warrior but instead you come to a point where every ounce of your being depends on the strength that Jesus can place in you. Its not about being brave, courageous or unbreakable but instead being broken, scared and uncertain and in those moments our strength runs out and we reach out to the Father in our desperation, and in our desperation He picks us up and gives us a determination to continue walking with Him through the storm.

There were moments where I didnt think I could take one more step and there where days where tears flooded my soul and uncertainties haunted my mind but even still God stood right there, He didnt sit high above like a spectator at a movie but He was apart of the cast in each scene of my life. Right now I am praying for God to reach down in all the hurts and prayers tonight. Praying for God to continue to reveal Himself and show how personal and loving He is. Thank You Jesus for being in my most precious and joyful days as well as my darkest and for always loving me and carrying through the unexpected.We trust in Your miracles and Your power and claim it now in the name of Your Son Jesus and believe with expectation that You will come through!!!!

We love and trust in You Alone. In Christ alone our hope is found You are the light our strength, our song. This cornerstone this solid ground, Firm through the fiercest drought and storm. What heights of love, what depths of peace, when fears are stilled, when strivings cease. Our comforter our all in all, Here in the love of Christ WE STAND!!!!

Choosing to love....

A few years ago I wrote a blog about my husband and the love encapsulated within in our marriage. I shared a very real and honest testimony of how marriage has been difficult for us and I can bet we aren’t alone. Life is difficult and when you have two imperfect humans brought together you double the mess and the hardships. It’s much easier to tackle the stressors of life with a teammate but it doesn’t divide the heartache that will come because there are two of you. It’s heartbreaking to see so many broken marriages, or marriages and relationships today that lack love and commitment. I’m not talking about that warm fuzzy feeling so many people call love because after a while the butterflies in your tummy that you had when you first met him or her will run out.  

  

I love my husband but there are moments where I don’t like him so much, and vice versa. The idea of commitment I’m talking about is the decision to love the other person in a sacrificial selfless way. Love is a daily decision we make to remove the selfishness and love another more than our own plans, desires, or agenda. I always love the idea that “love is a decision and not just a feeling.” This is so true and one of the hardest things in life a lot of us I learn I think because there are moments when I don’t feel all warm and fuzzy inside in my marriage and I know my husband Scott would say the same thing. There have been moments where I wanted to scream and I have driven him to the edge many times also. It’s not just about this giddy romance that keeps us together it’s a daily decision that we made a commitment to God and each other that regardless of how tough life would get we would make the choice to tough it out together. Now that doesn’t mean every day is difficult and a struggle to just stay in my marriage without any of the good, warm fuzzy stuff because I love my husband but we have had our seasons as most couples. There are moments where I am madly in love and other times where life is difficult and its a battle. 

I think most people have this idea in their heads about what a relationship entails whether it be a romantic relationship, a friendship, a work relationship, or a spiritual commitment and there is this idea that because there is a bond between the two then things will just magically fall into place and the fairytale will write a story that’s “happily ever after.” What people don’t realize though that yes this bond brought you together but there has to be a whole lot of blood, sweat, and tears to keep the relationship going. One of the greatest acts of love we can ever experience in the love affair with our heavenly father. Nothing could be a bigger example in this entire world then the ultimate sacrifice Jesus paid for us because He loves us. Jesus knew the pain and torture that was going to take place but even though it brought discomfort and burden to Him, He ultimately chose to be selfless to show us how much He loves us. The sacrifice and choice I’m talking about isn’t just in marriages but is the foundation for any a relationship you have. Whether it be with a parent, a sibling, a aunt, uncle, friend, coworker, pastor, whatever the situation there is still this desperate need for sacrifice to show genuine care and concern for the other person. Sometimes its hard because we may have the best intentions but we have to realize it takes putting others first, above ourselves and saying regardless of how much they hurt me and how difficult it can be at times I will choose to love this person, not because I always like and agree with them but because I am acting as Christ would want me to act and putting aside my selfishness for the survival of our relationship. 

Over the past few years I have had major health struggles and have been in the hospital for weeks and weeks at times and my husband has had to endure a lot because of it. I know there are marriages that wouldn’t have lasted dealing with the things we have, and I know there are a lot of guys who would have left a long time ago but my husband has continually showed me what love is about and how unconditional it is. Despite my illness and the burden that has been on him he still chooses to get up every day and love me and endure the pain with me. I think it’s easy when the going gets tough to give up and throw in the towel but love is about sticking it out and fighting for that person because you are desperate to have them apart of your life. When someone hurts you, disappoints you, persecutes you, it’s in that moment where you have the opportunity to make the choice to love them . They may not deserve it but you are going to act in the way as Christ did by displaying His love for us on the cross even when we didn’t deserve it.  Colossians 3:13 “Be gentle and forbearing with one another and, if one has a difference (a grievance or complaint) against another, readily pardoning each other; even as the Lord has [freely] forgiven you, so must you also [forgive].”Love is done in a way that doesn’t expect anything in return but is about a sacrifice and saying…regardless of what happens I will choose to act in a way that is pleasing to God. I will choose to put others before me. Love isn’t about the feeling you get, but the ability you have to offer yourself to someone, emotionally and sacrificially to serve and love them as Jesus would. 1 Corinthians 13:7 (The message) Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head, Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first, Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,Doesn't revel when others grovel,Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trust God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back,But keeps going to the end

The first stone....

Over the past few weeks there have been numerous events happen that have caused my heart to be heavy. Last Sunday I heard a sermon about stepping out of our comfort zone and being the hands and feet of Jesus so that others would want to know Him. After talking to someone this week and extending an invitation for them to come to church sometime I was blown away by their response. It was in that moment I questioned if the church had failed in some ways to really represent the love that Jesus talks about, it was in that moment I had felt like a failure somehow. The response to my invitation that I got from this woman was that “people in the church are judgmental.” Wow that statement hit me like a ton of bricks and took my breath away for a moment.

The one place in this entire world you should feel loved and welcomed people are feeling judge and condemned. Somehow we need to change this way of thinking whether it be with our actions or the way we represent ourselves, our attitudes, our outreach I’m not sure. But I do know before I had a relationship with Jesus I too felt the same way and I have come to learn that there is this misconception that the people who go to church are perfect, have lives that are all together, never struggle with sin and are in a place that’s far beyond some peoples reach and never attainable for them and their mess. When someone invited me to church 10 years ago I thought to myself, “it’s not for me, my mess is way too big and those people don’t understand.” 

I will get real here for a moment and say that as a Christian there are standards the Bible has for our lives that I follow to the best of my ability and because I have given my life to Him it’s my greatest effort to live a holy and cleansed life. The catch however is this, I didn’t wake up one day and magically turn into the person I am now. It took many years, prayers, tears, lessons, forgiveness, joys, and mess after mess in my humanness that I had created that had to be released and cleansed only by Jesus.  As Christians or witnesses for Christ if people are missing the journey we have traveled and believe we are perfect and can do no wrong then as a church we have failed to show the broken, dirty, shattered pieces that have been laid at the feet of Jesus and transformed by His grace. Romans 3:23 “For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God's glorious standard.” It doesn’t mean that now I never struggle or that I life this joyous and stress free life each day but it means that in my humanness when I need strength when I need someone to fight for me and lift me to my feet and love me spite my faults I have Jesus. We read in John 8 of a woman who committed adultery and a group of people who brought her to the middle of the town in front of everyone and called out her mess before them. Jesus was there teaching at the time and they wanted to show off her sin to Him. They pleaded that the woman be stoned for her transgressions and Jesus response could have been that but instead He answered boldly , “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”  One by one the people began to turn and walk away until only Jesus and the woman were left. Jesus then responded by saying “not one person condemn you so neither shall I” and he told her to go and leave her life of sin. This story in the Bible is a huge lesson to others about how we all sin and fall short and that because of that, we do not have the right or privilege to judge or condemn another person.

It saddens me deeply to think that people fear stepping into church because of the people in it. To the people who aren’t in church today and feel like you have been judged by someone else I am sorry and if I have ever done this to another person I apologize right now and seek forgiveness because I to am a sinner only saved and transformed by God’s grace.  I may look like I have it all together but I tell you what, I am a mess underneath. My life has come from deep sin, hurts, scars, brokenness and the list could go on and on and who am I to judge another person’s journey, and how dare another person especially in the church do the same!! I pray that as you consider a relationship with Jesus or the decision to give church a try please know that it’s not a room filled with perfect people and lives but instead filled with broken people that have allowed Jesus to remove the hurts in their lives and transform their story. With that being said there may be judgmental people, there may be people who struggle with addictions, there may be people who have deep debt, there may be people who gossip, there may be people who drink and although God has called us to live a life free from these things we all started somewhere and I hope you will also. 

As you read this ask yourself first why you aren’t in church or what turns you off about church? If you are in the church can you think of a time where maybe you were judgmental to someone else and need to ask God for forgiveness for this moment? I pray as the Lord calls us to go into the world and show the love of Jesus that we would do it in a way that others would not look at us and see perfection but instead brokenness transformed by Jesus. I pray that God would give me the tenderness and compassion to meet others at their time of need and be reminded of the emotion and battle I faced in that moment one time also. We all have a story and a journey and its only through Jesus where we can be cleansed and transformed.  

Hustle and Bustle......

What a weekend! I thought you were supposed to look forward to the weekend because its during that short 2 day break from the normal work week that you can rest and relax a bit right? I must say for me it’s been one of those weekends where I was honestly looking forward to Monday because I am exhausted. Like so many others I am sure this weekend was filled with Christmas preparations nonstop. From Christmas ornaments, paper snowflakes, lights, snowmen, presents, musical practice and all the other hustle and bustle it’s been overwhelming. 

This past Saturday we decided to put up the Christmas tree. Macie is always so excited and it’s something she looks forward to every year. Although I look forward to it also its always such a huge process. With moving furniture and getting out the boxes of ornaments and decorations, it literally takes hours and hours to get all the Christmas decorations up and the tree trimmed and glowing beautifully. This year as we were trying to get prepared so that we could decorate the tree Scott and I were both super frustrated at all the sorting and reorganizing of papers, iv supplies, toys, clothes, just lots and lots of stuff and the attitude and energy that flowed through our house was downright ugly. It was a moment of realization for me that I had gotten so caught up in doing that I forgot who I was doing it all for. 

Christmas is a time of celebration and joy, a time we can be reminded of the birth of our Savior Jesus. Every year as Macie’s birthday approaches I begin the preparations for the perfect party. I work on decorations, presents, guest lists, location, food, and the next thing I know it’s become such a huge task it’s exhausting. I can’t tell you how many pictures we have from parties Macie has had in the past and I look a hot mess because I had been running around up until the very start of the party so much that I wonder how many of those parties I really enjoyed and wasn’t so wrapped up in the busyness to just sit back and celebrate. Christmas is a lot like this every year for so many. We want to make sure everything is just right, the house is decorated beautifully, all the details are in place for when we have people are over, we picked out the perfect gift for each person, each family member has the perfect outfit to wear to Church for Christmas Sunday, the next thing we know our calendars are busting at the seams and we are running around so frazzled we can hardly think straight. Can anyone relate?? Does anyone else understand what this feels like, am I the only one?

 When I had that ah ha moment Saturday while decorating the tree, I really had to stop take a deep breath and say to myself “why are you doing all this? “Jeremiah 17:10 “I the Lord search the heart and examine the mind, to reward a man according to his conduct, according to what his deeds deserve.” My attitude needed adjusting and I needed to be reminded that instead of planning the perfect party for Jesus birthday He just wanted me to be a guest. I think Jesus would be flattered at all we do to prepare for His birthday but if it merely causes us to lose sight of Him, then I would imagine He would tell us to save the decorations and presents because we are missing the point. 

As Christmas quickly approaches I just encourage you to evaluate your attitude, your schedule and your priorities and be aware of the reason we do all the “stuff” in the first place. I love being with family, I love gift giving, I love decorating our tree, I love seeing all the beautiful lights glowing from house to house but I don’t ever want to get so caught up in all the “stuff” we do that I lose sight of who we do it for. My prayer is this “Jesus please forgive my selfish heart, remove anything that is a hindrance and is of my own agenda. Make me aware of the times where my attitude stinks and I need a major adjustment and help me to be conscious of the chaos and busyness. It’s all about you Jesus and because of that I celebrate You, not just on December 25^th Christmas day, but now this whole season.  Psalm 51:10 “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right, persevering, and steadfast spirit within me”

Red Shiny Nose....

“Rudolph with your nose so bright, won’t you guide my sleigh tonight.” Hearing these words by Santa’s deep and gentle voice always sound so comforting and nostalgic. Growing up one of the memories of Christmas time drawing near I remember the most is catching “Frosty the Snowman” and “Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer on cable TV. It plays numerous times from Thanksgiving until Christmas but regardless of how many times I have seen it, it never seems to get old. A short story of an insignificant reindeer with a bright red shiny nose captures the hearts of children and families everywhere. Macie and I happened to turn on the TV. tonight for a few quick moments while finishing up the bath/bedtime routine and happened to catch the infamous reindeer in action. My heart began to jump with joy, and as Macie giggled with excitement we sat cuddled together watching the remaining 30 minutes of the movie. 

Although just a cartoon and a storyline which is completely far-fetched we could still all learn something from this traditional Christmas movie. Rudolph was teased and struggled with feeling very insignificant and out of place due to his shiny red nose. He spent so much time running from the light and trying to cover it up, afraid of what his friends and family might say. Instead of seeing his nose as a beautiful vessel he saw it as an embarrassment. Although others didn’t understand the beauty initially, in the end we learn of how the one thing that others saw as being a hindrance and abnormal was really the very thing that set Rudolph apart from all the other reindeer. Rudolph had a light that lead his life and because of that he was able to push through the monster storm and lead Santa and the others on a beautiful journey.

I wonder how often we struggle with the Rudolph syndrome. We run from God or hold Him at a place in our lives where we are afraid to let His love shine bright and instead of embracing it we try and hide. We run and embrace the things of this world that don’t belong and find ourselves feeling separated and lonely like the misfit toys in the story. Or we don’t want others to see how real, beautiful and personal that relationship can be because we are afraid of what others will say and will view us as being abnormal or not cool. We often find though that regardless of how hard we try to cover up the light of Jesus in our lives we will never fully be able to. God’s love for us is amazing, abundant and unconditional, its power is something so intense that once we are touched by the love of Christ we can never run or go beyond His embrace ever again. We will never understand the depth of God’s love and the fact that even when we run and try to hide we can never go beyond His reach, its all-consuming and overflows throughout our entire being onto every aspect of our lives. When life is good and we need to celebrate He is there, and when life is difficult and there are huge storms ahead it’s that very light that can lead us through. 

The story of Rudolph turns out the same beautiful and perfect way every time I see it. He realizes the power and beauty behind the light and how important that light is in being the guide in the most important things in life. The scary thing is that the story of Rudolph is just a kid’s movie, it’s not real life and there are no alternate endings but in life there are. Each day we have to choose to embrace Gods love and allow that love to be a light and guide in our lives. We can choose another path but what will the journey along the story or the ending look like? John 8:12 “When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” Allow the love of Jesus to be that bright vessel each day that will lead you along life’s most beautiful and most devastating and difficult storms.

Glass of OJ......

 Lets play a little game. I will say part of a phrase and you name the product behind the commercial. "baby come back" (Swifer wet jet) "can you hear me now, good good" (Verizon" and one of my favorites,"maybe we should chug on over to mamby-pamby land to get you some self-confidence, you Jack Wagon," (Geico). How did you do??? I admit there are some pretty good commercials out right now but you have to admit there are also some pretty annoying ones too. The ones that are annoying in my opinion are either due to a.) as a marketing tool the volume always seems to go up about 5 increments when they come on or b.) they are just really cheesy.

One commercial that comes to my mind as being annoying is for the Prudential Insurance Company, and it has a huge whale tale flipping around in the ocean with this really odd music playing obnoxiously loud, does anyone know what I'm talking about?? Every time that commercial comes on Scott and I look at each other with the Cameron "give me a break" look and just chuckle to each other. The funny thing however is usually the most annoying commercials are the ones that leave the biggest and longest impressions in our minds which we remember, hence the marketing has worked perfectly. Every once in awhile though there happens to be a few commercials that really catch my attention. Scott loves the different commercials on ESPN which feature different sporting team mascots. Can you think of a specific commercial that's out right now that you really enjoy, or maybe one thats no longer on t.v. but it really caught your attention because you liked it or was annoyed by it???

Right now there is an orange juice commercial on t.v. that I love. The first few times I saw it I didn't think much about it but watching it this morning it gave me a different perspective. There are two versions of this commercial I have seen so far, one with a woman and one with a man. In the commercial the main character is sitting at the kitchen table and there are different people sitting around it also with him. He goes through a timeline of his day and the other people around the table chime in saying at what time what disaster will happen. 9 a.m. such and such will happen then at 10 a.m. he will get a flat tire all while his daughter continues to ignore him for a reason he is clueless about throughout the entire day and so on. After he gets through the projection of his day the punchline is "well at least I've had my orange juice." Does anyone know the commercial I'm talking about???

After seeing this commercial a few times I started thinking about a few things. First, what do you think it would be like to wake up everyday and have a roundtable discussion about what disasters to expect throughout your day? By knowing whats ahead we would be able to plan and remove the unknown of everyday life. We could always pack an extra pair of pants for that 9 a.m. coffee spill or remember to make sure our debit card is in our wallet for that lunch date instead of leaving them in our pants pocket the night before or even planning ahead to take a different route picking our kids up from school at 3 p.m. because there is a train stuck on the tracks. However we can't do that, and as glamorous as it may sound in theory if we did remove the unknown of the day then there would be no need to have faith and trust that regardless of what comes our way throughout the day God will provide. Instead of a dependence on Him each day I have a feeling we would start leaning on our own understanding for every situation and have the mentality that we can "plan" for whats ahead so we got it under control. Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." I don't know if it would make things easier or not but we can't just snap our fingers and have our day appear before our eyes instead of knowing whats ahead we have to face each day blindly.

If we look at the commercial another way, the way that it was intended through the punchline "good thing I had my orange juice," its saying that man my day is going to be crazy, but because i've had my oj I will be ok and make it through. What we if we treated our lives like this everyday but instead of a cold cup of oj in the morning we had our fill of Jesus. We all have days where its like the commercial and it seems like one thing after another keeps happening except we usually arent aware of them before they happen. By loading up with Jesus and our armor every morning its not going to ensure that we will never have one of those "terrible, horrible no good very bad days" ever again but it will give us comfort in knowing that we are prepared mentally for whatever is ahead. One thing we can do to prepar is by seeking God and asking Him to fulfill us in a way spiritually that He can be present in every part of our lives. Its by asking God to hold our hands every minute of everyday and walking with us. That doesn't mean life will be easy and unexpected things wont happen each day but it means that we wont have to face it alone. Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you."

Each day Satan is on a mission to try and use those little disasters to bring us down and break our spirit but we have to remain hopeful. We have to just put one foot in front of the other and do the best that we can depending on Gods strength and not our own. There is a quote I read from someone else and it says "You choose how you want to feel about what happens to you." I love this quote because its so true, we can't necessarily choose what happens in life all the time but we can choose the way we react and the attitude we have. As you face each day instead of wishing for a rundown of your day and the disasters that are ahead by the people in the oj commercial get it from God because He already knows whats ahead and can help carry you through it all better than anyone else